Wednesday, October 19, 2005

"You want the day to fit to a soundtrack..."

Looking at the date on Blogger's saved draft of this post, it's shamefully obvious that I have been gone far too long. In the meantime, Eliott Smith has put out another album (posthumously), as did Liz Phair (post-attempt-at-a-pop-album); and Luis and I have started working on another show script and on a top-secret project. All we can tell you about those last two is that you all should watch out for: (a) more inappropriate incurable-disease-related jokes and (b) bastard-eating eagles. YAY!

Before I get back to the arduous task of bastard-eating eagle-raising and catching up on my blog reading, I feel I must complete this important tast, posted by Thor and then answered in this blog by Luis, who noted that, as music geeks, this is a bittersweet task that is both more enjoyable and more difficult than it normally would be. Of course, even normal (<--term here used loosely) music geeks don't fantasize about the movie that will be made of their lives. I do. It used to star Winona Ryder, until I gained some weight and she, a shoplifting problem.

Just kidding. I didn't gain weight (it's true! I used to be shaped like an amoeba when I was in college! they lied about adolescence and sports keeping you in shape!) and I never did get around to casting the movie of my life. I did, however, make a soundtrack. To wit:


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If you were to create the sountrack of your life, this would be the song playing when you are...

LONELY OR DOWN:
"Sad Loved Girl" Scheer; "Maps" Yeah Yeah Yeahs

IN LOVE:
"Manna" Tanya Donelly. Because, at the end of the day, there really isn't a better declaration of love than the simple statement, "But I'm here now, and I'm staying put."

FIGHTING WITH YOUR SIGNIFICANT OTHER:
"How Am I Different?" Aimee Mann

HAVING SEX:
I would prefer for there to be no music in these scenes, but if the director insists, threatening, for example, to put a 70s porn soundtrack in the absence of any choices, I would pick: "The Yard of Blonde Girls" Jeff Buckley; "Hey" Pixies; "Hotel California" The Eagles. Fuck you, I'm not explaining that last one.

NURSING A BROKEN HEART:
"Holah" Mazzy Star. "Baby, won't you change your mind?"

IN NEED OF CHEERING UP:
"Think About your Troubles" Harry Nilsson

ABOUT TO EMBARK ON A ROAD TRIP:
"These Are the Days" 10,000 Maniacs. And when the road trip's about to end, "Passenger Seat" Death Cab for Cutie

FEELING GROGGY AND NEED TO WAKE UP:
"Mr. E's Beautiful Blues" Eels

FEELING SUICIDAL:
"Nirvana" Juliana Hatfield. "Should I end it all? Now, here comes a song I love so much."

ANGRY, VERY ANGRY:
"Waitress" Tori Amos. "But I believe in peace, bitch."

SINGING, DANCING, AND DRUNK OFF MY ASS:
"Born Slippy" Underworld

CHILLING ON A RAINY AFTERNOON:
"Mr.Zebra" Tori Amos

REMINISCING ABOUT HIGH SCHOOL:
"Stars" Simply Red, for the high school prom scene flashback; for everything else, there is embarrassing hair rock and some classical music. I was kind of a strange and pretentious kid.

REMINISCING ABOUT COLLEGE:
Choose any song from the following albums:Achtung Baby U2; In My Tribe 10,000 Maniacs; Ten Pearl Jam

GETTING MARRIED:
The string quartet version of "In My Place" by Coldplay. Yes, I've thought this one out.