Saturday, January 01, 2005

"Anger is a Burglar Who Steals Our Brains" (or, Happy New Year, All)

So this is 2005. I've just watched the final episode of Justice League season 2, and am now therefore devoid of any real purpose in life. My laughable recent attempts to abide by a healthier diet have left me without a molecule of comfort food in the house -- just whole wheat bread and watery-tasting apples. If the usual superstition applies and January 1 is indeed indicative of the way the rest of the year goes, then 2005 should be a lot of fun. And before my sarcastic head disappears any further up my own sarcastic ass, yes, I do realize that for tens of thousands of people, this new year is already worse beyond anything they could have imagined.

Change of topic! Look, it's the Best Albums of the Year. Allegedly. (Or audibly, as some people might say). Wow, almost nothing in the Top 30 is readily available at record stores here. Then again, Orange & Lemons and the complete works of Lito Camo aren't readily available abroad either. Life is full of trade-offs.

Speaking of trade-offs, I want to kill my neighbors so much right now. I don't know what that has to do with trade-offs, exactly, but I really do want to kill them. It's not just the fact that it's almost five AM as I write this and they're still playing their stupid music. It's the fact that the stupid music that they're playing is loud enough for me to be driven insane by its mindless repetitive bass lines, but not so clear that I can make out any actual songs. Somehow not even being able to make out the tunes, horrible though they probably are, makes it all even more excruciating. I feel like I'm being experimented on by giant mad scientists who are trying to determine the most efficient ways to make humans explode using sound waves.

Lucky for my neighbors, I have just been watching episode after episode of morally sound entertainment (if you don't count premarital sex as basically immoral, and I don't -- not that any sex takes place onscreen of course, but it is heavily implied between Green Lantern and Hawkgirl, Green Lantern and Katma Tui -- hey! That Green Lantern's a studmuffin!), and thus, with the shining example of Superman and friends to guide me, I am not as easily inclined towards wrongdoing as I usually am.

Anyway, as one of my best friends once told me, nothing is wrong forever. So eventually my neighbors will die and I will get some sleep.

Goodbye 2004! ;p Happy New Year, everybody!

PS. Look, Achewood meets Peanuts, or at least Ray meets Charlie Brown. It's both crushingly depressing and hysterically funny! You know, like life. More Achewood goodness (or badness) here. That last line had me laughing out loud.

PPS. I want nachos. Nachos with lots of thick melted cheese and salsa. Mmm, nachos.

1 comment:

Acid42 said...

you can always order this and do the same to your neighbor!

good luck!